2004 RG Impressions
WOODSTOCK: THE RG.
It's funny sometimes how one can draw parallels. If you ever
saw the movie about the Woodstock music festival of 1969 (Woodstock: The
Movie), you might remember that it began with the laborious process of
setting up that huge and now historical event. Then came the actual event.
And then an enormously larger crowd than was expected showed up. And it all
came together in an almost magical fashion, and was a tremendous success.
And at the end, it showed the empty fields and the cleaning up process.
On Thursday, the day before the RG officially began, I went
to the site to deliver the tee-shirts and to help with the set-up. On Friday
the crowd began tickling in. By Saturday night it was obvious that we got
more people than I personally had expected to see. And it/we came together
nicely, very nicely. Lynn Pina in the role of Michael Wadleigh the director.
Susan Barnes worked like a stevedore to keep everybody
well-fed and comfortable. I gave up trying to count the loaves and fishes
she kept serving up to the multitudes. The last count I heard, which I am
relatively sure is unofficial, was 172 people.
Ben Thompson was OUT!-STANDING! as the younger people's
Three days of fun and music. And Peace, let's not forget the
Peace. Someone should write a novella about it. . .
Fast-paced, non-stop enjoyment. Good people. With just the
right amount of adventure, intrigue, and surprises. I write this now, on the
very rough Monday morning after. Some things that are in my journal are: The
Cuban Cigar Massacree, complete with eight-by-ten glossy pictures with
circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one; midnight
interlopers (the elevator note from the eighth floor); my Janet Jackson
SuperBowl Tribute; "D-Sig" (or what I refer to as the Roamin' Orgy); a
Scottish kilt (what WAS he wearing under that?); more beer than a lot of
micro-breweries (thanks Bill); Joe Zanca (no need to add any descriptive
there); Eileen and the auctioned video-tape; the tee-shirt contest!!! (John
Lewicke's head popping out of the shirt- the closest my wife has ever gotten
to looking like Dolly Parton); 6,487 bags of trash :); Walter keeping vigil;
foot-rubs; back-rubs; front-rubs; laughing with Bill Alleman until my face
and stomach hurt (". . .JL: get in there you skinny little. . .");
silliness; fascinating conversations.
And that's just the stuff that's on the first page. More
Anyway, I have a date with an Alka-Seltzer. Lynn Pina: You
stood the chapter proud, and you certainly proved yourself. In the last 35
years since the original music festival, I have never compared anything else
to it. That ought to say something.
The last thing I remember seeing, as we drove away, was John
Lewicke loading the trailer by himself. The crowds were gone.
How in the world are we ever going to top this for next year?
AH! GEE! 2004.
After a few days to recuperate, (and to give my liver the
much needed and well deserved rest that I promised it), I have been shifting
through a combination of hastily scrawled notes and memory-mists. And a few
more thoughts floated up from the neural pathways of my tired brain:
I heard a lot of commenting about female (well mostly female)
flashers, however in all honestly I only counted three sets of exposed
breasts, again, mostly of the female variety. Well, then again, I am
assuming they were female, as I didn't actually investigate to be sure.
I also seem to remember that we did finally arrive at a
definitive answer as to what was (not) under the kilt.
It has been brought to my attention that when I previously
mentioned the back-rubs, foot-rubs, and front-rubs, I had neglected to
include bottom-rubs. To this I must disagree, as it wasn't neglect, it was a
conscious decision on my part to block out that scene in the D-Sig room on
Saturday night. Now, someone might ask me why I left out the bottom-rubbing?
Well, if I had included the bottom-rubbing I would also have felt obligated
to include the spankings which were also going on, on that same bed. And,
being the conscientious person that we all know me to be, I figured that
both of those could be left out.
So I decided to not mention the bottom-rubbings and the
spankings. I hope everyone is proud of me for not bringing that up. :)
I have also been asked why the biggest butt contest was not
held. The answer to that is that it was my fault: I only brought a
twenty-five foot tape measure.
The kissing booth was called off due to the fact that only
two women volunteered as kissees, and there were potentially over a hundred
and seventy kissers. Again, my fault, cause I had but one chapstick. However
I'd like to thank my wife (and daughter!) for volunteering. Sorry honey.
I never made it to the pool, but my understanding is that the
hotel has three bathing suits that were left in the water there. Lost and
found? Maybe we can do a Cinderella thing with them next year?
The wine and cheese taster went over exceedingly well,
Darlene doing her customary, exemplary best. I hope she didn't take it
personally when Eileen made a face at a couple of the cheeses. You gotta
understand that when we have a wine taster it involves four boxes of
California Zinfindel and packages of Velveeta and Cracker-Barrel. Cheesits
and Cheez-whiz for us. And what's with those years old wines? Where's the
fresh stuff? :) It was PERFECT!!
Ann won the best hugger contest, and I have a confession: I
was a secret hugger, and I voted for Ann. But in all fairness to the other
huggers, I went back for hugs from Ann about seventeen times over the three
days. Got a couple from Tom too, but I didn't let that interfere with my
Ah, who's next you say? Hmmmnn. Bill Alleman! I already said
that he made me laugh till my stomach hurt, but I never said why. The
problem here is that I don't have enough space to really describe the
scenarios, it's kinda-sorta like you had to be there. Which because I have
been told and I saw the pix I know I was there. I have never before seen a
comedian do three solid hours of stand-up while sitting on a sofa! I fell
off my chair twice just watching his facial expressions. I tried to keep up
with him, Ma, really I did. But I was lacking, and sadly, was no match. "Is
that a pledge pin!! On your uniform!!!" And, "I'm NOT gonna pay a lot for
this muffler!!" come to mind immediately. Anyway, ask me sometime in person
with Bill there and I'll tell you.
Rich ran a most excellent movie room, as I am told he always
does. Rich: I really, really was not teasing you about the DVD player. And I
was only joking about putting on that Johnny Holmes tape that was auctioned
off by Joe.
Did anyone ever find those @&%@$&^$% cigar boxes I lost each
of the three nights I was there? Anyone ever do a study on Mensans and
memory loss? (I forgot what I just said).
John Bauman: I have another Cuban for you. Her name is
Isabella and she thinks you have nice hands. Please have her back by April,
when her green card expires.
Never have I been to such a gathering as this and not seen
even one single person who wasn't having fun. Even the house-cleaning staff
were happy. Even the guys picking up our trash seemed to be enjoying
I'm kinda glad I have a year to get ready up for the next
one. . .